God Forgive Me

I must ask God to forgive me for my out-lash. We are like little children who got very hurt, and we don't know how to process the pain. I'm sure God understands. We just need to keep our heart soft and supple, and not allow it to harden. He cares for His children tenderly, more so than our earthly father. He will not give us a stone, when we ask for bread. I ask for wisdom, to understand, though He does not have to explain to the clay what the Potter is doing. There is nothing wrong with asking. The answer may be yes, no, or wait and see. I must believe His ways are higher than our ways. I must stay grounded, and keep hoping, and believing.

Romans 8:28-30New King James Version (NKJV)

²⁸ And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.

 My Hungarian friend encouraged me, in the following way.
 
"You write that you have no hope. Do not even speak such thing, as we always must have hope, or our lives will cease if we have no hope. Try to be at peace, and recognize that Deborah was very proper, and she could not handle this worldly life, and did not want to  live  a corrupt, indecent empty life. For this reason she achieved  the utmost respect. She left us, in such a way that she remained pure. Be glad that she was this courageous, and wise. Rest assured, that great responsibility is on you, so that your family can live a proper life. This is a mothers fate, and calling. You must have hope that the three girls will not falter and make big mistakes in their lives. You must greatly pay attention, and hope that one day you will even have a grandchild, and everything will be restored and compensated, you'll see.With much love I send you my hug"

This dear friend in Hungary, sacrificed her families safety at one point, for years, in order for us to immigrate to Canada. As a high official in the government, she was instrumental to our escape as a family of four.
I trust her like a mother, and her love for us was demonstrated in such away, that we acquired our freedom to leave a communist country in 1970. It was another nineteen years before people could come and go without visas in the European countries. Thousands of people died attempting to escape the communist regime.   November 9, 1989 was when the Berlin Wall fell, and East and West was merged. Hungary still remains my beloved homeland. One day I hope to visit again.