Well, I have little to say, really. Sometimes the quiet is welcome, other times I need to be around noise. I visited Deborah's little fish this morning all alone in the bowl. She came up to look at me with those wonderful curious eyes. Deborah named her Daffony, and my girls make sure she has clean water and is fed every day. I'm just thinking how she must miss that robust beautiful voice and world of Deborah, that she was part of. The chasm/ breach between us is untamed. I cannot live in the bowl to be with her, and the fish cannot live outside of water where I dwell. It is like the world that Deborah lives in. I cannot be there, and she cannot be manifest here at the moment. BUT, I can go to where she is, if I walk with my Maker worthily. One day I will be with her, and that day is coming fast.
I must buy lots of distilled water at the drug store today for Daffony's bowl. I happen to have 175 dollars worth of free items, since we saved our points for a while. Then there is Moonshine, Deborah's cat birthed on our porch by a stray cat. She is adorable as a button, and was born in April 3 years ago. Since I painted Deborah's room, This dear cat has been sleeping once again on Deborah's bed. She sits each morning and awaits a fresh bowl of water from me, and on occasion is still caught sitting by the door waiting for Deborah to come home.
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| Friends |
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| Graduation 2013 |
I've just connected with the mom of Deborah's good friend, and she tells me she just sat through 3 hrs of commencement ceremony with one of her daughters. I did the same 3 years ago with Deborah. All the dress shopping, and photographs. It is the season all over again, but without my girl. Once again the silence is painful. The house is not the same.
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