Monday, March 13, 2017

Tomorrow is Deborah's birthday

I am getting frustrated with my computer that keeps heating up. I think google has been down as well today. Aside from that, I went for a walk in the cemetery with other ladies who lost loved ones to suicide. I was surprised I could keep up, my face was flushed when we finished. apparently, one afternoon the cemetery is closing for a private viewing for the Chinese community, since they cannot bury  their dead in Richmond where most of them live. The water table is too shallow. I missed the pot luck dinner for families who are survivors of suicide. Despite the fact it was written in my calendar, with the time change, and my shopping spree, I forgot about it.
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Happy Birthday my Beloved
 Tomorrow is Deborah's birthday. It will be a very hard day. I wonder if her sister's will buy her a cake like for the last 2 years. I'm already feeling zoned out. I got some pain killers today from the doctor. I had a glass of wine tonight. After all, I am human. To be here is not to be present with the Lord. It is getting more and more painful. Tomorrow,she would have been 22 yrs of age. Born at Lions Gate Hospital in the evening. A beautiful daughter with perfect dimples in her cheeks.

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